CPAP machines and sleep equipment — the nightly routine

This article provides general information about CPAP machines and sleep apnea equipment. Your parent's specific condition, treatment plan, and equipment needs should be determined in consultation with their doctor or sleep specialist.

My mother finally admitted something one evening after I'd noticed her nodding off mid-sentence for the third time that day. "I'm exhausted all the time," she said. "I don't understand why sleeping eight hours doesn't help."

That exhaustion turned out to be sleep apnea, which means her breathing was stopping repeatedly throughout the night. She wasn't actually getting restful sleep. She was waking dozens of times an hour without realizing it. When the sleep specialist prescribed a CPAP machine, my mother's first reaction was skeptical. She'd be wearing a mask all night? The whole thing sounded uncomfortable and excessive.

That was before she experienced a full night of uninterrupted sleep. Everything changed after that.

What CPAP Actually Does

CPAP stands for continuous positive airway pressure. The machine works by gently blowing air into your parent's airway at a steady pressure, which keeps the airway open during sleep. When the airway is open, breathing continues normally. No pauses. No gasping for air at two in the morning.

Sleep apnea is genuinely dangerous. When breathing stops repeatedly, your parent's blood oxygen drops. Their heart has to work harder. Over time, untreated sleep apnea increases the risk of heart disease, stroke, and sudden death. It also makes you miserable in the here and now. No wonder my mother was exhausted.

The CPAP machine itself is a bedside device that connects to a hose and then to the mask that fits over your parent's nose and mouth (or sometimes just their nose, depending on the mask style). The machine operates quietly, though it does make some noise. Air delivery is timed to your parent's breathing cycle, which feels natural to most people once they adjust.

Your parent's doctor or sleep specialist will conduct a sleep study to determine their specific pressure settings. This is measured in centimeters of water pressure, which sounds technical but really just means the machine gets calibrated to the exact pressure needed to keep that specific person's airway open.

Getting Your Parent to Actually Use It

Here's the gap between prescription and reality: having a CPAP machine and actually using it every night are two different things.

The adjustment period is real. Wearing a mask over your nose and mouth while lying in bed is weird, even when you understand intellectually that it's going to help. Your parent might feel claustrophobic. They might feel like they can't breathe out properly. They might think the pressure is too high or too low. They might hate the sound of the machine.

These are all normal complaints, and they're all problems with solutions.

First, encourage your parent to get comfortable with the mask during the day. Putting it on while sitting in a chair for a few minutes before bed takes the strangeness out of it. They'll see that they can breathe normally, that the air flow isn't suffocating them, that the mask doesn't feel as invasive once they've worn it a few times.

Second, mask fit matters enormously. CPAP machines come with different mask styles. Some cover just the nose. Others cover nose and mouth. Some look like a pillow that goes under the nose. There are full-face masks for people who breathe through their mouth while sleeping. If one mask style isn't working, a different one might. Insurance usually covers trying different options. Don't accept a mask that feels wrong.

Third, take the pressure settings seriously. If the pressure is too high, your parent will feel like they're being blown over. Too low and they won't get the support they need. Most modern machines allow slight adjustments, but a sleep specialist can recalibrate if the original prescription isn't working.

Your parent might also benefit from a humidifier attached to the CPAP machine. Humidified air is gentler on nasal passages and throat, which can make wearing the mask more comfortable. There are heated tubing options too, which prevent condensation from building up in the hose and dripping back into the mask. These small accessories make a real difference in how tolerable the machine feels.

Making the Nightly Routine Work

Using CPAP is a nightly commitment. Your parent needs to use it every night for it to be effective. More realistically, your parent needs to want to use it every night, which is where motivation comes in.

Help your parent see the results. Keep a simple log of energy levels and daytime sleepiness for the first couple of weeks of using CPAP. Most people notice improvement quickly. "I didn't fall asleep at lunch today." "I actually finished reading that chapter." These small victories matter.

Create a routine. The mask goes on right before bed, after your parent has settled into their comfortable position. Some people sleep with a small night light so they can see the machine and tubing in the darkness. Having a water glass nearby helps if your parent's mouth or throat gets dry.

Cleanliness is important but manageable. The mask should be rinsed with warm water daily and dried properly. The tubing can be wiped down. The machine itself just needs to stay clean and have its filters replaced according to the manufacturer's instructions. It's not complicated, but consistency matters to prevent bacterial growth and maintain equipment function.

Travel complicates things. CPAP machines are portable, which is helpful, but they do need electricity. If your parent travels, they should pack the machine, all the pieces, and extra masks. Power adapters for different countries exist if they're traveling internationally. Some people also discuss whether to pack a backup mask in case theirs breaks or malfunctions.

When Your Parent Resists

Some people never warm up to CPAP. They tolerate it but resent it. They might not use it consistently, or they might use it for a few weeks and then stop.

This is frustrating. You know this machine is helping them. You've seen the research about sleep apnea complications. But you can't force someone to use a medical device if they're resistant.

What you can do is have an honest conversation about what the resistance actually is. Is it physical discomfort? Is it psychological? Is it grief about needing medical equipment? Is it because they tried it for a week, didn't feel different, and decided it wasn't working? Understanding the real issue might point toward a solution.

Sometimes a different CPAP machine helps. Brands vary in how quiet they are, how they ramp up pressure, and how smoothly they integrate with masks. If your parent tried one brand and disliked it, another might work better.

Sometimes adjusting expectations helps too. Your parent doesn't have to use CPAP eight hours a night from day one. They could start with five or six hours and build up. Progress is progress.

And sometimes you just have to accept that your parent is making an informed choice to not use equipment, even though you know it would help them. That's adult autonomy, and it's hard to watch. You can keep the machine ready, keep gently encouraging, and be there to say "I told you so" gently if they later decide to try again.

Equipment Problems and Solutions

CPAP machines are reliable, but issues do arise. If your parent reports that they're not getting any air flow, check that the machine is turned on and that the tubing is connected properly. Make sure the mask isn't leaking. Check that filters aren't clogged.

If the pressure feels wrong, don't just adjust settings randomly. Call the sleep specialist or the equipment company. They can tell you if an adjustment is appropriate or if the machine needs to be recalibrated based on new sleep data.

If your parent is experiencing new discomfort or breathing issues after using the machine successfully for months, that's worth reporting to their doctor. Bodies change. What worked perfectly six months ago might need adjustment.

The Long Game

Sleep apnea doesn't go away. Your parent will likely use CPAP long term, possibly for life. That means building it into their nightly routine the way they brush their teeth. It becomes part of self-care.

The benefit is immense. Better sleep means better energy, better mood, better cognitive function. It means your parent can show up for their life. They can spend time with family without fighting exhaustion. They're not at increased risk for sudden cardiac events because of untreated sleep apnea.

That's worth the adjustment period and the nightly mask wearing. That's what makes the equipment a tool for independence, not a burden of decline.

Sleep apnea diagnosis and treatment should be managed in partnership with your parent's doctor or sleep specialist. CPAP settings are customized to individual needs and should never be adjusted without medical guidance. If your parent has concerns about their CPAP machine or therapy, discuss these with their medical provider rather than abandoning the treatment.